Jerk Appeal
The reason why even the sweetest of women gravitate toward the jerk at one point or another is because he exhibits certain qualities that appeal to women universally. Sane women are not ball-busters by nature and want a man who has a backbone and displays a healthy amount of testosterone. We can't help but be drawn to the jerk's confidence and the fact that he doesn't let people walk all over him or tell him what to do.A relationship with a jerk usually gets ugly because he will inevitably take any sign of attachment from the woman he is with as a threat to his free-wheeling ways, and go out of his way to show her that he is, well, a jerk. For instance, if the woman mentions a concert she'd like to see with him in a month from now, he will interpret this as her wanting to be his ball and chain and will probably go out and find himself another woman ASAP -- without telling the ball and chain of course.So, the woman ends up not knowing what happened and goes crying to her friends about wanting the antithesis of the jerk: the nice guy. But alas, he is also all wrong.
Nice Guy Appeal
After being with the jerk, the nice guy looks really appealing. He is kind, listens and can't believe that jerk would cheat on a girl like her. But after he helps mend her broken heart, he suddenly becomes too nice. I mean, he watches chick flicks, goes shopping with her, and never says no.The problem? She starts to feel like he is more of a girlfriend than a boyfriend, and finds herself longing for "a real man."Hence the confusing conundrum. So which is it? What do
women want? We want the best of both worlds. Call it a nice jerk if you will, but I prefer the term sensitive bastard.The Fine Line
The way to keep the woman of your dreams interested in you and only you is to be sensitive while retaining your masculinity. Know when to be kind and understanding, and when to stick to your guns, so to speak. For instance, if she just got fired and is devastated, that is when you should be her shoulder to cry on and do something nice for her like rent her favorite comedy on DVD and watch it with her. On the other hand, if she decides to redecorate your place while you're away and you return to find that your bedroom is now really "pretty," it's time to sit your little woman down and let her know that she really shouldn't have .The key is to avoid both extremes of the nice guy and the jerk. Don't be at her beck and call, but be there for her when she needs you most. Don't cheat on her, but go out with guys and don't let her give you any grief about it. Don't ever let her think that she can tell you what to wear, eat, think, or say, but listen to and respect her opinion. You get the idea.This way, she knows that you love her but that she can't walk all over you, which is the key to her loving and respecting you. Throw in a romantic gesture or two every now and then and she'll be so in love, she won't know what hit her. Think about it, if you give her the best of both worlds, why would she ever want to look elsewhere?